Jim Henson Co. I Love You, But…

You’re bringing me down.

If you don’t know the song I’m quoting, it’s by LCD Sound System and called “New York I Love You, But You’re Bringing Me Down”. It’s expertly written, and it’s likely one of my most favorite songs right now. I love the combination of adoration and resentment the lyrics provide.

That said, I had no idea the official music video for this song features none other than a knockoff version of Jim Henson’s Kermit the Frog:

Poor Kermit, right? New York is obviously full of disappointment for him.

Now, let’s turn the tables. I’m Kermit, and The Jim Henson Company is New York. Hence, the title of this post. (I actually made the title for this post before I even looked it up. Sometimes, I just get it right.)

Don’t get me wrong, I love The Jim Henson Company, probably more than any adult should.

I grew up on the street. Sesame Street, that is 🙂 Fraggle Rock and Dinosaurs soon followed. Then, when I got too old for those, there was always The Muppets.

Red from Fraggle Rock was my childhood idol.

Red from Fraggle Rock was my childhood idol.

But it’s the films I really love. I’m not talking the Muppet Movies, although I do love me some Tim Curry as Long John Silver in Muppet Treasure Island.

You mewling little lily-livered, toffee-hearted little wuss of a crustacean!

No, I’m talking The Dark Crystal (1982) and Labyrinth (1986), the brainchildren of the actual Jim Henson and the greatest faerie-enthusiasts ever to walk the earth, Wendy and Brian Froud. I’ll likely devote a completely separate post to the Frouds, so check back if you’re interested in learning more about this dynamic duo.

Like I’ve said before, my obsession with The Dark Crystal runs deep. As a child, it both fascinated and terrified me. As an adult, I have been able to appreciate the high level of artistry and commitment the film clearly exhibits. Absolutely no humans star in the film, yet it manages to grip viewers with its expertly-designed sets and puppets as well as its story that turns out to be more philosophical lesson than breath-taking adventure (although it is quite an adventure). The world of The Dark Crystal is truly a gem:

How about that soundtrack? Trevor Jones is a genius.

I have read all the books inspired by the film, with the exception of A.C.H. Smith’s novel that is no longer in print. I’m remedying this soon. Tokyopop’s The Legends of the Dark Crystal is the first Manga series I have ever read. I thoroughly enjoyed it and even gave the first two as a gift to my nephew who loves The Dark Crystal almost as much as I do. Unfortunately when he asked for the third volume in the trilogy, I had to tell him none such volume will ever exist, because it had been cancelled.

Such was my first disappointment with The Company, as I will refer to them from now on for efficiency.

In 2010, when I heard a film sequel was in the making for The Dark Crystal, I could not have been happier. Finally, I thought, I get to see more of this spectacular world. I closely followed the news of the purported sequel The Power of the Dark Crystal for years. The Company released storyboards, team-members, and images. As new developments came out, I shared them with my nephew.

Art of Queen Kira released to promote The Power of the Dark Crystal

Art of Queen Kira released to promote The Power of the Dark Crystal

Then, in 2012, The Company broke our hearts. After several announcement the project had been put on hiatus, it was cancelled.

This, after I suffered through the The Muppets (2011), which, wasn’t all bad, but wasn’t all good either. I’m not sure how it got a 96% on Rotten Tomatoes. Maybe I’m just bitter this project came out before The Power of the Dark Crystal, but the story line bored me. I did like the introduction of Walter. I see a little of myself in him. Perhaps Disney is to blame, but I recall only ever laughing during Chris Cooper’s “maniacal laugh” bit:

Strike two, The Company.

A year ago, I decided to enter in The Company’s “Author Quest” for a prequel to The Dark Crystal, a.k.a. their way of making up for having cancelled the second film. I was one of over 500 writers to submit a book proposal. I didn’t make the top 20, but the top five winners are currently working with the Penguin Book Company to determine who will get $10,000 and a book publishing deal. The samples of the five authors are available here. I haven’t finished reading them yet, but so far I’m smitten. I don’t know how they’re going to pick just one author.

This book proposal was my first-ever, so it was pretty easy for me to forgive The Company for not seeing much potential in it. Additionally, judging by the selected authors’ bios, most of them are more experienced than I am in writing.

Still, this was the third and most personal “offense” made by The Company.

Now let’s talk about what spurred this post. Remember how I mentioned Labyrinth? Yeah, I love this film almost as much as I adore The Dark Crystal. After all, it’s got 15-year-old Jennifer Connelly plus the work of the Frouds and Jim Henson. I think the combination of David Bowie’s codpiece and George Lucas’ influence makes the film not as focused as The Dark Crystal, but that’s probably not a very popular opinion to have. Bowie’s musical numbers are still pretty fun though:

Well, turns out Labyrinth is still a huge hit. I think the star-power is to blame. After all, unlike The Dark Crystal, this film has humans in it, not to mention humans who still manage to walk the red carpet noticed. Variety thought it’d be cute to falsely report that a Labyrinth sequel was in the works. Then, after I had gotten all excited about it, thinking finally the gods of The Company have smiled upon me, it turned out to be a hoax.

This was the fourth blow provided by The Company (although shoddy reporting by Variety’s Dave McNary may be more to blame for this one).

While checking up on all The Company’s projects, I found out they had successfully returned to the world of Fraggle Rock in the Hulu original Doozers. Unfortunately, to even say this show is “loosely based” on Fraggle Rock would be a stretch. The only similarity between the two shows is that they both have Doozers who construct buildings. Whereas Fraggle Rock is puppets singing about life lessons, Doozers is CGI singing about engineering. More educational? Perhaps in a STEM sort of way. More entertaining? I think not.

Consider this development the fifth and final upset from The Company.

You know what they say. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. I’m not sure what they say about being fooled five times. Perhaps that I’m a loyal masochist.

So for all the hope and positive energy I try to exude in this blog, know that certain things to do with fantasy can disappoint.

I will say that despite all the let-downs, The Company has given me and other fans some silver linings. Last year’s Muppet Holiday Spectacular featuring Lady Gaga, Elton John, and RuPaul was absolutely magical considering those are three of my most favorite performers of all time.

Jim Henson’s Creature Shop Challenge also premiered on Syfy earlier this year, and as I do not have cable, I haven’t been able to watch the well-received reality series in which puppet-makers compete for the dream job with The Company. Consider it on my list of things to watch. Also, due to the publicity the Labyrinth 2 hoax received, it seems there might still be a chance for The Company to pursue such an endeavor.

Still, I’m not going to get my hopes up.

Don’t worry Jim Henson Co., “you’re still the one pool where I’d happily drown.”