I Like Unicorns

Okay, understatement of the year, I know.

But I mean, I really really like unicorns.

Don’t believe me? I’ll prove it.

Favorite animated movie: The Last Unicorn

I think I already said that in my introductory post.

Today, I made an appraisal of all of the unicorns in my apartment, and I wasn’t shocked by what I found. I have a lot of unicorn-themed stuff. Like a lot a lot.

I blame the recent popularity of all things unicorn-related. Unicorns are back in a big way. Celebrities like Lady Gaga and Taryn Manning are getting unicorn tattoos left and right. Unicorns are even on fashion runways!

Lady Gaga's infamous unicorn "Cutie Mark"

Lady Gaga’s infamous unicorn “Cutie Mark”

Taryn Manning, a.k.a. Pensatucky's unicorn arm tattoo.

Taryn Manning, a.k.a. Pensatucky’s unicorn arm tattoo.

Does this horn match my hooves?

Does this horn match my hooves?

Where was this trend when I was twelve years old and still clinging to my Lisa Frank unicorn school supplies? I know, I was super-cool.

Anyway, when unicorn paraphernalia was hard to come by, I used to buy whatever I saw with a unicorn on it. Usually that manifested itself in ceramic unicorns from thrift stores or the occasional XXL shirt from the children’s section of Target. Now, if I did that I would be broke and drowning in unicorns (even more so than I already am). Not to mention Chris would probably tell me to take all my unicorns and move back to Florida.

This is what it looks like to drown in unicorns.

Thank you, The Last Unicorn, for teaching me what it looks like to drown in unicorns.

Most of the unicorn stuff I have were gifts, but I’m guilty on all accounts of purchasing some of them myself.

Here’s a few of my unicorn things:

"And Vladimir collects cer-a-mic unicoooorns!"

“And Vladimir collects cer-a-mic unicoooorns!”

Acrylic on canvas board by the lovely Ashley Taylor.

Acrylic on canvas board by the lovely Ashley Taylor.

Chris must really love me,  because this is what we have hung over our bed.

Chris must really love me, because this is what we have hung over our bed.

Even my tape is touched by the magic of a unicorn.

Even my tape is touched by the magic of a unicorn.

Two unicorns guard my bearded dragon, Custard, like mini Oracles.

Two unicorns guard my bearded dragon, Custard, like mini Oracles.

Check out the 70's unicorn painting my friend Kelley gave me.

Check out the 70’s unicorn painting my friend Kelley gave me. Pretty sweet, huh?

Not pictured is an “Ask The Unicorn Button” that says marvelous phrases like, “Never stop believing. Miracles are everywhere!”  in a whimsically airy voice (great for a bleak office), a unicorn head “piggy” bank, a cute pair of salt and pepper shaker unicorns (Thanks, Mom & Nicole!), some crazy-high glitter unicorn heels, and several unicorn shirts.

Remember that scene from Dodgeball when Vince Vaughn’s character thinks he smells something good cooking in the main female protagonist’s home, but, to his horror, he finds it completely full of unicorn memorabilia? I don’t want to get to that point, but I will. I may need a unicorn intervention.

In conclusion, should any of my friends and family ask themselves what to get me for the holidays, just back away from the unicorns. Seriously, they have horns for a reason.

Fancifully Yours,

Jessica

P.s. -This post is about 24 hours late, because my creativity has been quite invested in NaNoWriMo, National Novel Writing Month. It’s my first year participating! Wish me luck, because I’m already behind on my word count, and I’m going to need it! Post in the comments if you have any NaNoWriMo experiences or suggestions.

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